enigma

i had this pic taken during the fasting month few months ago. i forgot to blog it that time but better than late ya. so if you think you are having a very bad day today,  pay attention to the pic below. hope it helps you today with a little bit of laugh.

boleh ba kalau menapau ahaha.

cerita pasal kursus, ni speaker pun buli tahan jg.  suda la serious subject then suddenly tengah2 concentrate mendengar ni dia menanya.

speaker: apa guna litar bumi?

siurang: mencegah litar pintas.

speaker: litar bumi adalah sangat penting untuk mencegah bahaya api kepada satu2 bangunan. oleh itu litar seharusnya boleh mengelakkan litar pintas ya. so apa jin yg paling bahaya?

siurang: huh??

speaker: jinjeres (dangerous) la … ahahahaha.

akakaka lawak la tu speaker.

seingat sa la, paling last peperiksaan yg sa last ialah dalam 4 tahun yg lalu. masa tu sa kena jawab soalan sebelum boleh dapat slot interview tuk kekosongan kerja. sa fail ekeke. neway, hari ni sa p kursus. dalam kursus tu ada dalam 65 orang peserta. jadi ni si penceramah pun cakap la ini itu sambil kasi edar2 nota n alat tulis. mula2 dia bagi pen, lepas tu pensel, pemadam last sekali pembaris. sa pun hairan la. tiba2 dia bagi tau nanti hari terakhir kursus akan diadakan peperiksaan tambahan. tekejut juga sa. bayangkan la suda bertahun2 tiba2 kena ambil peperiksaan. bukan sa satu orang tapi hampir semua peserta.

penceramah: jangan takut…saya tau kamu semua suda bertahun2 tidak pegang pensel terutamanya yg lelaki ni.

peserta lelaki: yaaaa!!

penceramah: tapi sa tau … ni wanita2 ni mmg cun kalau pakai pensel ni.

sa: huh?

penceramah: apa nda … sikit2 lukis muka, sikit2 luki kening … nda lama lukis bibir.

wakakakakakaka adoi sakit perut sa ketawa.

two studies were done resulting 2 different results.

result for the 1st research was : 1 out of 5 people snores.

while the other result was 4 out of 5 people are suffering for insomnia.

conclution: 1 sweet dream equivalent to 4 nightmares.

ekekekeke

okai..for those people who’d like me to post a reply of your ‘tag’ thingy, im sorry for the long delay. the truth is, im not really a fan regarding to this but maybe this time i’ll write some for fun. yup, for fun. ehehe. i’ve already fogotten some of the request so i’ll just reply on si cicak punya tag ok. sorry big time to the others.

there are rules but i’ll just do the first part of em ahaha which is;

Rules:
1. Each player of this game starts off with 15 weird things/habits/little known facts about yourself. <– this is the only rule i’ll follow haha. 

ok have fun reading.

1. my name. it starts with the letter B and ends with the letter E while having a total 17 letters in it. an additional 5 letters for my father’s name resulting a 22 letters long. it was always a burden just to fill in forms especially for examination answer sheets. my name was picked from each of my aunts’ best interest and not by my parents lol. funny. i end up with a very orang puti name but friends, they call me by my nickname toturi, a very japanese kinda name. weird.

2. i like art. music, literature, photography, drawing, painting, written words, quotes, etc. my best interest is on music. i write songs, lyrics and play instruments but i do it all with no help from others. i learn em all by myself. i can write a song without knowing a damn thing about chording hahaha. i just know how to play and enjoying it by myself. people might say i have a talent but i say, it’s because of hardwork. speaking of it, i suddenly remember a website where i posted some of my earlier stuff i wrote, back in the year 02-04. check it out at http://www.i-bands.net/audiovault/bands/1659/music.php . i wrote some of em for mother nature, if im not mistaken. listen to natagak, that was my masterpiece haha. also, check out my first and the only band i ever had La Sagos http://www.i-bands.net/audiovault/bands/1706/music.php . enjoy it while you still can. dont mind the vocal ahaha i was never a good singer but it cant be helped, i had to sing just because no one ever came close to sing my songs. weird.

3. cloud. i like to watch the clouds. i like how they, for some reasons, change shape. sometimes, it’s a dragon and few seconds later it becomes a little white rabbit up on the blue sky. i always wonder how it feels to sleep on top of them. they look very white-ish cutton bed, you see.

4. star gazing. i dont remember when it started but i really like to see the stars. i spent my youth star gazing like every night forgetting shoolworks after dinner. used to be scoolded by my mom but it all worthed the satisfaction. i used to like astronomy but i eventually end up a blogger. i’ve forgotten that dream so many years ago, i don’t remember why.

5. weather changing. i like when it rains. it’s the gloomy feeling that caught me on that moment. all the trouble thoughts got washed away by the sound of rain and the pouring water, well i like that kind of thought.

6. carefree. i dont like complicated stuff. really. i read so many books regarding on contradiction and complication or sort. i dislike the idea of making things complicated even more when it is already bloody messy in its current state. there are things meant to be simple but most of us want them to be more complex, just so we satisfied. weird.

7.  bloodline. im am like most of my cousins, having a great great grand dad of a dutch. woahhh. decendent of an orang puti la senang cerita. my nanny was an american. waahhh. she came to keningau as a red cross volunteer somesort. back in the old days. 25+ yrs ago. dad is a dusun and mom is a murut. all the mixture came together becoming me, a chinese looking kid. that what most people say. even though i am having that kind of bloodline, i never came close like 1. i am lacking every part of it. weird.

8. self proclaim handsome guy wakakaka. nahhh, i always joke around people. it’s good to see people laugh and smile. it brings happiness to me, for sure. i like to smile a lot, you see. once my lecturer asked me, “why everytime when i look at you, you’ll always smile?” and i was like … huhh? cannot meh? weird.

9. boring. i’ll get bored super sonicly fast ahaha. i don’t know why. i get bored when nothing happens. i mean, i dislike the same old thing revolving around the same pace. i demand changes!!!! hahaha.

10. pet. i like fish. i like to see how they slowly swim. i really like ikan kalui. people say, if you dream about fish then in reality, you’ll get more money in return. i cant really tell the logic behind that interpretation but it works most of the time, if not all the time.

10. snake. i dislike snake in reality but i really want to have dreams of snakes. my mom told me a very long ago, if you are having dreams on it, it means that someone in the opposite gender is having some good feeling towards you. yoshhh!!! come here you beautiful ladies hahaha i want one.

11. i drive a lot of cars. you name it. ironically, i don’t even own a kancil. weird. but i’d like to have a ninja king ehehe.

12. same as si cicak, i respect all teaching in the name of their own GODs. but i disrespect people who were taught to be a good person end up a stupid one. i dont fancy any truthful religions propaganda, i just wanna be a simple heavenly guided good person.

13. i believe in alien. beings who are living billions if not trillions ligh years away…or even more. i am interested in UFO. in fact, i saw something i can’t explain hovering the sky years ago. to make it simple, imagine a stick of cigarattee hovering the sky above, later on it breaks in the middle, each of the seperated parts fly on opposite ways and dissapears in thick clouds.

14. i am born a lion and a rooster. RARRR!!! now kok kok kok. ohh wait, damn, it feels wrong ahaha. macam berani2 penakut pla. ehh nda, ayam sigun maini ekekeke.

15. im longing for a kirai. tu sigup nenek2 tu. ahaha.

ok…thats it. my 15 weird things in mind. i supposedly to choose another 15 tag names but im kinda lazy to korek2 names from my blogrolls. reply to this if you feel like to ok.

ada la ni YB masuk kampung pigi dingar ni masalah2 orang kampung. satu2 dia dgr. jadi ada la ni dia mo bagi peruntukan kereta supaya bagi kesenangan sama ni urang2 kampung.

yb: kamu mau apa? kancil ka rusa?

orang kampung: yb, kami ni nda juga memilih … babi pun buli ba.

wakakakaka

ada ni urang puti nama paul pigi ‘home stay’ di satu perkambungan dusun. tujuan dia untuk belajar kebudayaan orang2 sabah. mo satu bulan juga si paul ni tinggal sama orang2 kambung jadi banyak juga dia belajar; tanam padi, ikut memburu binatang, minum tapai, etc.

nda di sedari oleh si paul ni sampai pla suda masa dia mo balik pigi negara asal dia. jadi ni orang2 kampung pun buat la farewell party. ada minum tapai, ada menari-menari, sumandak sini sana. memang best la sampai ni orang si paul ni telupa mau balik. cek punya cek, alamak tinggal 20 minit lagi flight kapal terbang dia. tergesa2 la ni orang puti jadi dia pun cepat2 ucap terima kasih sama selamat tinggal sama semua orang kampung. masa tu kereta mo jalan sd, tiba2 ada ni satu nenek teriak2 panggil ni urang puti. tapi tu kereta suda jalan jadi ni nenek buang ni 1 sisir pisang pigi dalam kereta sambil teriak

“nahhh uiiii, sia kasi bawa kauu pisang buli gia kaw bikin makan makan nanti di kapal”

Paul: ok ok now nenek, thanks alot!!! (sambil lambai tangan sama tu nenek)

tiba2 tu merah muka tu nenek sambil gergitan dia cakap,

“adiiiiiiiii ni urang putii… sia suda nga kasi pisang dia mauu lagi sia punya TENSILOT.”

p/s: tensilot –> perempuan punya ‘thingy’ ekekekeke

ok tu hari sa p jumpa si butod sana beverlly hills ada mo bincang2. jadi sa tunggu la dia turun dari ofis. sa parking keta depan tu 7eleven. sa membeli minuman pastu duduk2 d simen depan2 tu tangga. jadi turun la si butod ni. trus kami cerita2 bisnes.

cerita punya cerita tiba2 sa ada mo tulis note tapi telupa bawa pen. sa pun apa lagi lari2 anak pigi kereta. sa kasi masuk la tu kunci di pintu tapi nda buli buka.. sa pun heran ni. suda la mo cepat lambat lagi mo unlock.

terus sa dgr si butod teriak2, “boss, ni na ko punya kereta!!!’

wakakakakakakakakaka

kurang ajar sepa la tu p parking kereta yg 1 biji sama ni di depan2 tu 7eleven.

selalu sa dengar cerita macam ni berabis sa ketawa… ni kali turn sa kena, berengset!! akakakaka

apa lagi ketawa gila babi la siurang .. odoi.

i got this joke from my tour guide named yoyo. me and versus got a good laugh at this one.  here goes.

yoyo: why if people play gol’ef (golf), the ball go inside the hole?  <– the way his pronunciation.

so the 24 heads got into pondering. time passed by and he gave the answer.

yoyo: because the grass is green.

then most of us got blurred and some of us asked why.  so he answered again.

yoyo: because if the grass is black, the stick will go inside the hole.

I laughed like hell the moment he said the ‘black grass’. so did versus. the other got blurred. later on my aunt got the hint and when she said ‘ ohhhh’ then the whole bus got into big laughs.

black grass *wink* ..  down down hair. LMAO.